literature

Trip

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Daily Deviation

Daily Deviation

January 31, 2011
"Around the world in 23 lines--" This is Trip by *georgie-ludovic.
Featured by nycterent
Suggested by zebrazebrazebra
CrumpetsHarvey's avatar
Published:
5.9K Views

Literature Text

1

I speak six languages, French on the train,
Flemish in a square, money in my top hat,
I sell the hat, travel on, Italian at a Cathedral,
Hebrew on a mountain, money in my flat cap,
I travel against the sun, speak music with him.



2

I did not lose my treasure on the crossing
and no pirates approached our ship.
The natives are civilised, for natives;
a charming prince with a nose ring performed a dance for me.



3

wine buckfast lager pass a smoke man the dope shroom stash smashed
out of my head can't feel my feet the bed half a pill I'm delirious dead



4

Strong man and the Siamese twins dig ruts for the wheels
and the acrobat brews tea in a tin kettle.

I toss my top hat at a bear, for Mother Russia has been cruel.



5

And in India – Kerala, the south, yes – reading the Edakkal Caves,
Kutti Chattan, poems of 600 BC, love, kings, Roman ships all sailing in;
the Varthamana Pusthakam travelogue. For the BBC, yes.
A good documentary, insufficient, of course. The Bordeaux, lovely, yes.



6

The polymaths of mars,
we are too too busy building atmospheres
and shattering quarks, for poetry.
Although, in the 37 minutes spare in the day,
I expel a line or two.
This is my :iconhammeredpoetry: entry for prompt #2, though I'm not sure about it.

Does it all work together? I really wanted them all to be united as strongly as some of the entries, but it isn't. Still, how well does it hold together?
Does it make sense without the prompt?

Grumble. I have about 5 alternative stanzas which I rejected deciding they didn't fit and had to rewrite. It definitely made my brain bleed, so I suppose I've achieved something.

Update

I edited: it was too long, and stuck to the limits but not the spirit of the prompt. So I've pared it down a bit though not as much as I intended. Maybe later.

Also, thanks very much to the people at :iconlitplease: for featuring me in The Favorites project!


Update Two


Huh. A DD. Remarkable. Thanks!
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AzizrianDaoXrak's avatar
This is just a little note to let you know this gorgeous piece has been featured!: [link]

I'd appreciate it if you took a peek at the other features and faved the article to help support the other artists!